Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Diggin' For Gold

In pursuit of an ideal mate, one MUST be able to identify the qualities, which hold a high level of importance to him/her.  I would venture to hypothesize that if you wrote down your top five attributes for your mate to possess, something in the neighborhood of ambitious, desire to excel, or successful would be included.  Rightfully so, in my humble opinion; I know it is, shamelessly, in my top five.  No one (I use this term knowing that some jerk out there would disagree solely for the sake of disagreeing) would find a bum with no ambition to be a qualifying candidate for the “future building sweepstakes”.  Nice title right? Lol..

Social constructs, on the other hand, have made us self-conscious about citing ambition as an endearing, attractive characteristic because of the possibility of earning the dreaded “gold digger” tag.  Cue Jamie and Kanye. “I ain’t sayin’ she a gold digger, but she ain’t..” (Clears throat) Allow me to continue. 

I ask you. What makes someone a gold digger?

Often the tag would be “awarded” (I chuckled a bit) to a young man/lady whose success and/or cash flow paled in comparison to the “goldmine”.  Athletes are repeatedly instructed to beware of girls using them for their earning power or, once the power is realized, the actual money.  I do have a bit of potentially SHOCKING news for you, though.  Athletes are NOT the only group of people with groupies.  In my experiences, I have arrived at the realization that potential is an extremely difficult thing to ignore, and someone will frequently admire from afar recognizing the potential for one’s success.  Computer engineers, lawyers, doctors, professors; all these and many more.  Mo’ money, mo’ problems? True. BUT mo’ money, mo’ groupies?  Certainly!  There is always someone looking for a meal ticket.

Remember, as the term gold digger is a societal term, the qualifications are of fluid nature.  So, again, I ask.  What makes someone a gold digger?  Is it the equality of funds and/or potential to generate them?  Does it lie in the timing of interest?  Many would agree that being down before the success negates the potential tag altogether.  Does this phenomenon even truly exist?  What do YOU think?  I am here to massage your brain and spark insightful thought, and with that said, I bid you adieu.  Thank you for checking in the GAME! Stay tuned, as I will be hitting y’all with more stuff soon! God Bless!

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Happy Holidays!



Sunday, December 19, 2010

The Past Is The Past, Right?

Intelligent? Check. Attractive? Check. Go-er? Hmm.. What exactly is promiscuity? How does one define how many is too many? Does a relationship negate the label? What if he/she is a serial monogamist? Hmm..

Because of this fluid definition, interpretations vary greatly, but one thing that remains constant is if someone fits your mold, they have probably fit someone else’s at an earlier time.  Translation: Everyone is someone’s former ___________ (fill in the blank). In my travels, I have observed that women are frequently more understanding of this unavoidable fact than their male counterparts, who shudder to think that, in a lady’s 20+ years on earth, someone could have possibly been in their position (negating the fact that various other females have been in hers).

Sidebar. And this is REALLY random!  I am on a plane right now, and I must say that I think first class is one of THE most ridiculous scams to extract more money from passengers. Slightly larger, slightly more cushioned seats, a cut bedsheet to separate you from the “common folk”, and all of these not-so-great features equal $150 added to your already expensive ticket?! No, thank you. Do you know how much stuff you can get with $150?! (Exhales.) Thanks for listening.  Now, back to the post.

Along with the aforementioned fact of previous employment (former whomever), comes comparison and eventual competition.  No one wants to be second or indistinct, unmemorable, etc., and thus, pop culture addresses the topic with songs like Trey Songz, “Does He Do It” and Kanye West’s, “Blame Game”, just to name a couple.  Everyone wants to be better than the past, constantly competing with the ghosts of relationship past. At the conclusion of “Blame Game”, Chris Rock performs a simulated conversation with a previous lover with whom he has reconvened for a second go round, after an affair with West. When Rock inquires about her vast improvements in various aspects of their relationship, she continuously responds with, “Yeezy taught me.”  Now, speaking as a proud man, this would be a NIGHTMARE for any self-respecting man; to be constantly reminded of another man being in your place.  Drawing from my observations, the insecurities, which behavior, such as this, spawns can cause significant damage, spelling a potential end for a relationship.

So I ask, should someone’s past affect how you impact his/her future?  Should we all take on the mindset that the past is the past, we just have to move forward?  In my humble opinion, the past should carry weight as to whether, or not, one INITIALLY enters the relationship, but once a new chapter begins, the past must planted, so the future can bloom.  It is impossible to focus on and develop a new relationship while obsessing over exes, who are distant memories and hold no meaningful importance, as obsession over uncontrollable factors can cloud one’s ability to progress with the present and future.  Concern yourself with writing a NEW chapter and building NEW, unique memories!

Thanks for checking in the GAME with Just GQ! Stay tuned for more posts this week! Feel free to leave your comments on the blog! God Bless! Oh, and do NOT forget to FOLLOW JUST GQ! Click the “Follow” button in your right panel!  Thanks! è è è

Thursday, December 9, 2010


In researching a blog about this year’s Heisman, I came across this gem by Fox Sports writer, Kalani Simpson, which says pretty much EVERYTHING I wanted to.. Hope you enjoy it! GIVE THIS MAN THE HEISMAN! 

“Here is the thing about Auburn quarterback Cam Newton: You have to give him the Heisman Trophy. Have to. He is the very embodiment, this season, of the most outstanding player in college football. He is what this season has been about. There are some seasons where there really isn’t anyone all that outstanding, and the guy who gets to go down in history is nothing more than the player who happens to receive the most votes that year. And other years  there are two or more good choices.

But this year it is Newton. He deserves it. There’s no getting around it – he IS it. He belongs with all those other greats, for all time. Put his portrait on the wall.

Really, the only reason to invite anyone else to New York for the ceremony is out of decorum. But here’s the other thing about Newton. The Reggie Bush thing – giving his Heisman back, under a cloud of allegations about cash and gifts – was, what, September? And now, in the very next go-round, we get this. This!

You have to give it to him. But there’s been enough smoke you have to think that there’s fire coming down the line. But the NCAA has declared him eligible, as of the voting, which ended Monday at 5 p.m. So you have to give it to him.

But even his own program – Auburn University! – has stipulated that Cam’s dad had his hand out, at least in regard to Mississippi State. You can’t make this stuff up. Reggie Bush sets the precedent. And in the very next election ... what is this, a set-up? Bush’s stiff arm was stripped (ahem, returned) because he was ineligible. Check that, he was eligible at the time, or he wouldn’t have been on the field in the first place. But it turns out he shouldn’t have been.

Well, Newton is eligible – he even has it on NCAA letterhead. But that doesn’t mean that anyone – including the NCAA – has stopped looking. That doesn’t mean this is over. That doesn’t mean any of us can breathe easy. And wait. What’s that smell? (Sniff, sniff.) Smoke. But you’ve got to give it to him. This whole thing is a Catch-22. Which brings to mind this old saying every Auburn fan knows by heart: Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t after you.

But you could just as easily tweak it to this: Just because it's a witch hunt – and it has been that – doesn’t mean the guy (or his dad) hasn’t flown a broom and mixed up a little eye of newt. So what are we to believe? That Newton’s dad did a little fishing, and when no one bit, he ducked his head sheepishly and said, "Aw, well, never mind, then."

Or maybe it was this: Auburn’s a great program, sure. Auburn's a big-time team, one of the traditional powers. Auburn, what an education! Auburn, who wouldn’t want to go there? But go to Mississippi State? No, you’re going to have to pay me for that.

(Dear MSU friends: This is just a joke for dramatic effect. Please do not clang cowbells outside my house.)

And if you can’t buy any of this, well, Auburn fans can. They have to. This is their moment, and someone's trying to taint it. It seems this always happens to Auburn. (Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t after you.) No, Auburn fans, they have to believe. (As I said in the wake of last week’s column, theirs is the classiest "hate" mail I’ve ever seen. True, one guy told me on Twitter to "go play out in traffic!" But I’m sure it’s only the 140-character limit that kept him from closing with "and a very happy holiday to you and your family." Hey, don’t worry, man. That’s how I heard it in my head.) So, here we are. A scant three months after we excoriate Reggie Bush, we get this. Cam karma. Catch-22. But he’s going to get it, and he won it. He’s the one. Self-important types can talk about "integrity" all they want. But to give it to anyone else would take the integrity out of the award.

Newton will take the stage in New York and hold that trophy high. How long will he actually hold it? Well, these days we handle it one thing at a time. In years past, Bush might have been there. I don’t know where he'll be as it happens. No doubt he’ll be shaking his head at the irony of it all.”

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Monday, December 6, 2010

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

The turkey and dressing have been consumed. The tree has gone up. The mistletoe has been hung. It is OFFICIALLY the holiday season, and whether you know it or not, she is anxiously awaiting the exchange of gifts.

Never to fear, for the gentleman is HERE!

Men often struggle with the art of finding the perfect gift for the special women in their lives. The distinct gender specific personality attributes inhibit men from finding a balance between what she wants and what he feels is, in fact, necessary and appropriate. Men, generally speaking, undervalue qualities most women find endearing such as creativity and thoughtfulness because we think in a more practical, matter-of-fact mindset. What men must do is locate a middle ground between satisfying his female companion and his comfort level, in terms of the manner in which he spends his money. In the process of compiling this research, I came to find that while desiring similar feelings provided through receiving the perfect gift, the materialization of that gift differs greatly between sexes. I conducted a little study for myself; one, in which, I interviewed various types ladies to find out what, exactly, it is that they want for the holidays, and thus, I present to you…(drumroll please)… Just GQ’s Guy’s Guide to Gift Giving! Enjoy!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Just GQ Featured on

Happy Thursday, Just GQ Readers! Hope the blog has been keeping your entertained thus far! Just GQ is being featured on! This is another great blog, and I am truly appreciative to have my posts appreciated and used by another site! So, please check out and follow @boissuq on Twitter! NOW! Just joking, but seriously.. Lol.. God Bless!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

You Play To Win the Game!

Good afternoon, Just GQ readers! This topic was selected per reader request via Twitter. Please continue to leave suggestions, questions, and topics about which you would like to hear AND FOLLOW THE BLOG (click the little button on the right panel as you scroll down the entry) PLEASE AND THANKS! NOW…Time to check in the game (sound horn)!
Let’s face it… Women are more emotional, generally speaking, than their male counterparts. Additionally, the goals of relationships vary in “regular” scenarios between sexes. With that being said, it is rare for guys to scout a woman, much less begin a new relationship, with hopes that it will result in wedding bells and an Uncle Ben’s rice shower. Please pardon the following Neanderthal-esque comment, BUT it was most simply and effectively stated by one of my former teammates. He said, “When I talk to a girl, I want to hit. Plain and simple. It all depends on how long she makes me wait. If she makes me wait long enough that I get to know her and start to like her, then she got me. BUT if she lets me hit early in the game, GAME OVER!”

By comparison, it is not at all uncommon for ladies to see a guy and romanticize a first date, relationship, anniversarIES, and “I do’s” in their fairy tale driven minds prior to him saying “So, I’ll pick you up at 7?” Naturally, women desire exclusivity; to be the ONLY person for their mate. Conversely, men think slight—completely different. Let’s talk about the current scenario. Women frequently comment on how a shortage of good guys exists (not exclusive to race), so if one is deemed “a good guy”, odds are he is being or has the potential to be pursued by multiple female interests at a time. Now, in these ladies’ pursuit, an apparent disregard for the competition often conveys a message of “I am the better catch, and I intend on showing you that. I don’t care about the other girl.” With that attitude, if you don’t care, then he most certainly does not either! If you want to compete, then he will provide an arena for you to do so, alternating between candidates. SMH!

In a society growing increasingly more comfortable with a lack of commitment, guys, essentially, find commitment to be optional because, well, it really is, especially when younger. Commitment is rarely respected by other members of BOTH sexes, and the illusion of a PERCEIVED upgrade constantly looms in the wings. For the aforementioned reasons, it is EXTREMELY difficult for a guy, who did not necessarily want a commitment, initially, to fall for someone, letting his guard down completely, benching all the other girls he had on the floor, and completely focusing on one. It leads to an unfamiliar (and often unappreciated) feeling of vulnerability, which makes guys uncomfortable. Additionally, remaining with her through the senseless conflict, now adds anxiety, whereas prior to full commitment, it had been a non-issue, as if one girl tripped, the remedy was only a scroll, selection, and phone call away. *Kanye shrug*

I know all the ladies are heated, thinking or saying, “So what?! We have to do all that too, and I stay when he trips on me. I got plenty of dudes who—“ Chill on that. Keep in mind that you wanted a relationship early in the game. More than likely, a relationship was your objective from the start, as, rarely, do females only want to be someone’s physical outlet. Rebuttal? Thought so; moving right along.

The aim of this post is not to claim that guys invest more in relationships, but to provide perspective of the difficulty involved when he, voluntarily, excuses himself from the game to take a full timeout with you. I, personally, tip my hat to my fellow males and females, who recognize a valid match and commit without straying.

Thanks for checking in the GAME with Just GQ! Stay tuned for more posts! Follow the blog by clicking the button in the right panel! Leave your comments and questions on the blog! God Bless!